If you were to ask several men, they may reply that sex toys aren’t that popular in the bedroom; and in some ways they’d be right. Think about it? Where would you expect to find more packaged AA batteries, in the single 26-year-old females nightstand or the newly married couples dresser drawer? The $610 million in revenue that sex paraphernalia stores reported last year is proof enough that sex toys are no longer taboo. That said, what doesn’t make for acceptable bar conversation is the use of toys for self-pleasure by men.

jelly-rubber-sex-toys_7-things-that-should-not-go-near-your-hoo-haAs a society we are perfectly comfortable with the variety of battery operated devices women employ. On the other hand, the visions of a man using his mouth to inflate anything other than a beach ball or plunging his privates into a latex mold of the latest porn star’s privates are still considered a tad bit creepy.

Recent publications indicate that almost 92% of women engage in masturbation. This is the largest number reported, up from a previous 74% a little over two decades ago. Self-gratification is perfectly healthy but sex toys, when used for the self-pleasuring by women can have several implications.  Many women are now reporting that simply using their fingers is not enough and that the use of sexual aids is often necessary to achieve orgasm. That’s all well and dandy when your alone but can be intimidating for a partner. Most unselfish men achieve a great amount of pleasure from pleasing their partner. In that sense, having a woman achieve orgasm is just as important (and sometimes more-so) as achieving climax themselves. Being incapable of satisfying a partner without the use of a sexual aid is a huge downer for many men. As a result, they may even experience some feelings of inadequacy. Toys should be used somewhat sparingly when alone and should only be expected to complement bedroom acts, not run the show.

As with anything of great pleasure, it is best enjoyed in moderation. We must first know our bodies and what works best for us in order to  ensure we are adequately  pleased by our partners. Every person is different, no matter how many partners an individual has had, a conversation about what works is essential to best gratifying our partners. This entails the archaic measure of touching and exploring oneself. The overuse of toys can thereby make it harder to achieve orgasm from mere 2-speed fingers. I mean, they can only move and rotate so fast.

In addition, overuse does impact anatomy. Toys such as rabbits, bullets or any clitoral massagers can turn a neat “come and find me” tuck into a bit of a “no need, I’m right here!” lack of a tuck. As of January, 2014, it was reported that the average erect penis is approximately 5.1 inches in length and 1.25 inches in diameter. The average size of a vibrator is approximately 9 inches in length (handle included) and a diameter of 2-3 inches. Kegels are great, but I think we can all apply some general physics here.

While sex toys can no longer be considered taboo for self pleasuring, many couples are still not acclimated to the idea of sharing their bedroom more than one form of latex.