Fruit flies can be the most pesky organisms. They seem to come out of nowhere and encroach on your space in the most unwelcoming way.  We all know social fruit flies. Some of us can even be accused of carrying that torch from time to time. Social fruit flies or social flies as I prefer to call them are popular superficial persons who thrive on their popularity. Their whole life is founded on who they know and how that feeds their sense of self-worth. Attending events with a social fly can prove to be quite the experience. Here’s a list of 10 things to expect when out with a social fly.

1. Everything is a mission.

Social flies take pride in their “status.” As such, there are things that they “Just can’t do.” These include, but are not limited to,  buying tickets for an event from a local vendor (even if the vendor is closer in locale to them than the promoter), waiting in any kind of line, not being on a list or not having access to the VIP section.

2. Every Introduction comes with an unwelcomed, unwarranted resume.

If you’re out with a social fly, a mere “Aidan this is Dayna” won’t do. Instead, without soliciting the information, you’ll be told that person’s social relevance. As soon as they turn  their back your friend feels compelled to offer up what Dayna own, does or knows that makes her relevant.

3. Be prepared NOT to have the best night ever.

If you’ve invited out by a social fly then you may have the impression that you’re going solely to kick back a few drinks and have a good time. While that is partially true, chances are the outing is more about being seen and rekindling 5-year-old acquaintanceships than anything else.

4. Don’t be mad. They are going to be on their phones all night.

If they’re not whatsapping or texting someone, they’ll be spending copious amounts of time filtering their “no-filter” instagram photos. The worst part about it is you may be spending a great portion of your night taking the pictures for them.

5. Every event is a reunion

….. even though they just saw the person they’re out looking for a few days ago. I once spent an hour with a girl who was walking through a party looking to say hi to her neighbor. Her neighbor! As in the person who lives directly beside her.

6. Going up to the promoter/dj/host is a must.

I don’t know why. These people are working and it is my experience that you will eventually see him or her at some point throughout the night. Still, they feel compelled to go up to the dj booth or cut into the VIP section. Sure it’s to say hi, but who are we kidding here. It’s mostly to be seen saying hello.

7. They take name dropping to a whole other level.

It is nothing short of outrageous. It never has any place or relevance in the conversation and it’ll probably go on for the entire night.

8. There’s a lot of standing around.

Whether your standing around waiting for someone, standing around while they have a conversation with someone, or just standing around for God knows what reason, there will be random inexplicably moments of just standing around.

9. Their tight-knit circle isn’t all that tight.

In fact, a social fly will mostly likely not be seen with the same circle of friends they were seen with months prior. Their close friends always seem to be on rotation.

10. They’re chameleons.

Being a social chameleon can be a good thing in some ways. A person who can hold their own in any setting or conversation is invaluable. On the other hand, fruit flies are so concerned with fitting in that their opinions on any subject is as labile as the course of the wind. When speaking with Jane they may love one thing, while when speaking with Joan they claim to detest the same.

Cover Image courtesy of blackkk.pinger

We’re dying to hear your thoughts on this topic!  Do you know a social fruit fly? Leave a comment and tell us what you think.